Are you one of those that have tried self-help books or courses and found your life didn’t change at the core level?
Theories on why self-help doesn’t work are plentiful, but the theory I prefer is that most of these approaches are completely unable to help you think differently once you have finished the course/ book. Self-improvement usually is about finding your passion, your “true self” or ultimate meaning and having the courage to make that the priority of each day. It is my opinion that self-help products actually reduce your ability to fix your life.
Please understand that I am not high and mighty about reading self-help books. I have spent way too much on these books and courses because I believed their promises and I felt like I had no other recourse. So I am speaking here from experience with self-help.
After at least three decades of trying self-help, I can’t say that my life is better because I read How to Win Friends and Influence People, Think and Grow Rich, Secrets of the Millionaire Mind or any other of the major or minor players that told me my income and self-esteem would blossom once I have understood the material. And because I have been (and now am) an “A student” (at California College San Diego), I know the problem is not my intellect. (As a side note, after just a year of applying the teachings in The Twelve Commitments To Life, I noticed being happier with my life than I ever have been.)
Self-help instructors/coaches/preachers specialize in speaking our worst fears and telling us that we are not good enough as we are. They lay out a system that promises to make our life easier, more meaningful and productive in our areas of choice. But that doesn’t work because it starts by emphasizing our fears and makes that the basis of moving forward. And if we fail to get the results promised, our fears escalate and we are told to retry because the instructor “knows” and “has proven” that it works.
The Twelve Commitments to Life is not a system. It is listening to Life as you receive it and learning from Life’s most basic twelve ingredients. In my book, you become both student and teacher of your life. You don’t need anyone to tell you how to live. You are the best observer of your life and you are smart enough to read Life’s forces, hints and feedback. The only real requirement in this approach is to focus long enough and regularly enough to hear Life talk to you, guide you and grow you. That’s the wisdom that Life offers and The Twelve Commitments to Life is an inexpensive guide that helps you hear.
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