Suffering pains

I remember being 14 years old and having strange, intense pains in my legs. Yet, there was no visible cause. So, my parents took me to the family doctor who couldn’t find anything. He told my parents to “Relax. It’s probably just growing pains.”
“Growing pains?” I thought. “I’ve been growing for 14 years and growing pains were not present before. He must be wrong.” But he wasn’t. It was just growing pains.
Suffering emotional pain is a lot like growing pains. I’m not saying it’s just growing pains, but there are similarities. Often, our suffering is caused (or worsened) by our misunderstanding of a situation or clashing with an expectation we think we know is true.
Additionally, suffering comes from a grudge we won’t let go of, a lapse into victimization, a bad habit or lack of will to change. Like growing pains, these things may pass without any effort on our part. But it is more likely that these suffering pains will pass when we make effort and do at least two things:
1. Recognize our part in it and
2. Have willingness to let it go and live life differently.
 stressed legs
I found that during my grief over the loss of my father, that committing anew to the entire scheme of life (including the loss of my father), was the tonic I needed for my emotional pain. Committing to life, all of life, proved that I had done at least two things: I admitted my part in the suffering and I used willingness to let go of the pain and live life differently.
It’s okay to take these two steps without assurance that you will have the inner strength to do it. That’s like going to a dance lesson with two left feet. (Two steps, two feet.) You strongly doubt you can be taught to dance, but you go to class and give it a good try. In a few weeks you can move in ways you didn’t think possible.
Suffering and grief call us to the dance of life. We can stay “home” and miss out, wondering if people are having a good time at the dance. Or we can go to life’s dance and be willing to let go of our grief to live life differently.
Thanks to for the legs image.

This entry was posted in Crisis, Dealing with Grief, Suffering. Bookmark the permalink.

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